Bickley Park School Headmaster Tom Quilter discusses why kindness and good mental health go hand in hand and sit at the centre of life at the Bromley prep and nursery
“‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ ‘Kind,’ said the boy.” There are a number of reasons why this is one of my favourite quotes from author Charlie Mackesy – as the Head of a school, but perhaps even more so as a parent. What do we wish for most for our children and their futures? It is never great wealth or success that comes to mind, but for them to be happy and kind. That is what I want for my children, and for all those here at Bickley Park School.
With that in mind, it comes as no surprise that ‘Kindness’ was chosen as the Children’s Word of the Year 2024 according to publisher Oxford University Press. It is clearly something children all value and something they aspire to. The research also revealed that of the 61% of children who chose ‘kindness’, many associated the word with mental health. For me, these two terms are inextricably linked, with people increasingly being aware that kindness has the power to benefit our own mental health, and that of others around us.
“In addition to our focus on kindness, we also seek to teach the children about the importance of service – of giving back”
Kindness then, quite rightly, is at the centre of all we do in school. It is in the classrooms and corridors, on the pitches and in the science labs. It is in the Bickley Park School DNA and in the values that we encourage our children to live their lives by. Our annual Kindness and Mental Health Week provides a welcome focus, as we develop a better understanding of what ‘good mental health’ looks like and help to remove any stigma felt when discussing this important topic.
It has given us the opportunity to help our children develop the confidence and vocabulary to discuss mental health, consider the perspective of others and nurture empathy through acts of kindness within the school and wider community.
In addition to our focus on kindness, we also seek to teach the children about the importance of service – of giving back. We teach them about their place in the community and the importance of considering others.
We feel extremely lucky to be able to provide Bickley children with wonderful opportunities for community collaboration, diverse thinking and innovative ways of connecting with those around them. These include our Nursery children spending time at local care homes, our regular collaborations with other local schools and our support for projects that help families and people who live alone within our community.
These are just some of the initiatives that we have taken part in to help develop our children’s empathy and also recognise the importance of helping others. A recent thank you from one of our care home contacts referred to the children helping to ‘raise everyone’s spirits’. This was wonderful to hear and just one example of a connection in our community helping to benefit everyone’s mental health.
I am very lucky to see kindness in action every day at Bickley, where our values (Be Kind, Persevere, Succeed) are so much more than words displayed on a wall. They are embedded in everything we do, and in all the young people who attend our school.
Bickley Park School bickleyparkschool.co.uk
Further reading: Stories shared – how to encourage children to pass on books
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